Friday, 18 April 2008

And religion saves another convict...

Saw this in the London Lite today:

Banged up Blake turns to religion
Amy hubby now a Catholic

I didn't realise prisons were such great places to find new converts to religion. Obviously not a cynical ploy to get early release for good behaviour, oh no...

Time to be screwed over again...

http://www.guardian.co.uk/politics/2008/apr/18/gordonbrown.georgebush

Brown and Bush reignite that special relationship

I await the new Gay Bar Betamax vid...

Monday, 14 April 2008

Terrorism is a wonderful word, honest...

http://newsforums.bbc.co.uk/nol/thread.jspa?forumID=4607&edition=2&ttl=20080414133614

Some rather choice comments here, but let's take one, shall we:
"There are cultural differences in different countries, what is acceptable in one is not in another. For instance in France it is acceptable to smoke at a bar, here the PC nanny state Gestapo will prevent it.In a certain faith it is expected that everyone benefits from a deal, this is not to them corruption, therefore who are we judge, how pretentious!This is not the only enquiry that was scotched, anyone remember "Cash for Honours"
Confusus Theytry, WALES, United Kingdom"

Fantastic. So when ordinary Muslims try to go about their everyday lives, they have murder and terrorism shouted in their faces, but when it comes to the Saudis, suddenly it's a matter of "cultural difference" and we shouldn't be bothered?
Cognitive dissonance anybody?
But oh well, everyone knows that buying pirate DVDs so obviously funds Al-Qaida, whereas the country where the majority of the 9/11 hijackers came from is obviously our bestest friend in the whole wide world.
'Scuse me while I stitch up my sides.

Wednesday, 9 April 2008

Sympathy was never my strongest point...

http://commentisfree.guardian.co.uk/ruth_fowler/2008/04/club_rules.html

Article by Ruth Fowler.

I didn't realise that several of the (admittedly wide-ranging) criteria on CiF is to whinge about how you felt left out of the group so much and so felt the right to write an article on how everyone else is rubbish for being *shock* different from you.
Aw, poor Ruth. Don't worry, the evil liberal bullies won't get you if you write an article pissing and moaning about it.

And in the sporting news

http://news.bbc.co.uk/sport2/hi/football/europe/7335573.stm

Wenger unhappy at 'dodgy penalty'

No doubt he'll be taking it to the Court of Appeal. I'm sure Mr Al-Fayed will give him a few tips on how to handle this.

Tuesday, 8 April 2008

It's a conspiracy, I tells ya!

http://news.bbc.co.uk/2/hi/uk_news/7328754.stm

Princess Diana unlawfully killed

Cast your eye to this quote here...

"But Mr Al Fayed's father Mohamed has refused to accept the verdict."

The same guy who also said that MI6 assassinated her and Dodi on the orders of the establishment.
I'm just waiting for the retrial where no doubt claims of the Illuminati and Knights Templar involvement will start surfacing. I suppose the Assassins are going to have get cracking then...

Knut the not-so-innocent

http://news.bbc.co.uk/2/hi/europe/7336092.stm

"Shock at polar bear's carp kill"

Who says "Child Star Syndrome" (ie famous kids getting fucked up later on) is limited to humans...

Welcome

Welcome to my satirical blog. I figured I needed to jumpstart my piss-taking skills again, so here you go. Facebookers rejoice, the Senseless Scathing Satire has been refined, redefined and indeed had processes that involve the prefix "re-" in some capacity.

PS The title was inspired by the title of one of the comics on www.gigaville.com. Carry on the good work Chris, your webcomics help me get through the vagaries of working life.